The Other Woman – Part II

by | Oct 20, 2019 | Relationships

I’m no stranger to being cheated on. I understand the immediate betrayal and hurt as well as the deep need to blame any and everyone involved but here are some simple but overlooked truths:

  1. YOUR PARTNER MADE A COMMITMENT TO YOU. THE OTHER WOMAN DID NOT.
  2. YOU PARTNER IS GROWN ASS MAN/WOMAN, CAPABLE OF SAYING “NO”
  3. YOUR PARTNER MADE A DECISION TO CHEAT. HE WAS NOT LIKELY MANIPULATED, BRAINWASHED OR JEDI-MIND TRICKED INTO SOMEONE ELSE’S PUSSY.
  4. YOUR PARTNER IS TO BLAME FOR BREAKING THE AFOREMENTIONED COMMITMENT. 

At the end of the day, no one in the world can break up a relationship or marriage except for the two people in it. Each person in the relationship either safeguards the door or leaves that bitch wide open.  As for the reason the partner cheated, it could be a variety of reasons. Maybe your partner is no longer happy or in love. Maybe he wants out of the relationship but didn’t know how to tell you. Maybe the partner is happy in the relationship but is greedy AF.  Maybe your partner is insecure AF and needed his ego boosted. Maybe he fell in love with the other woman. Maybe there was some pussy being thrown his way and he just didn’t have the balls to say “no, thank you”. The bottom line is this: PEOPLE DO WHAT THEY WANT TO DO. If they want to be faithful, they remain faithful. If they want to cheat, they cheat.

I’m not saying that you should not be angry with the other woman. But I’m also not saying that you need to hug it out and become BFF’s. Feel your feelings. But don’t wallow in hatred and blame and anger. Don’t give her that much power.  Hold your partner accountable instead of putting your energy into threatening to kick the other woman’s ass. Maybe she didn’t know that he was married or in a relationship. Maybe she did know but just didn’t care. Either way, there would have been no room for her to cheat with him if your partner has not invited her into the mix.

Focus on your next move: healing through the pain, deciding if you’re going to stay or go and preparing for a glorious bounce back (either way).

“The worst kind of hurt is betrayal because it means someone was willing to hurt you just to make themselves better” – Unknown