After asking the right questions and listening to what you’re potential bae said, you should have a pretty good idea of whether or not you and this person are compatible or on the same page. Now it’s time to separate the bullshit from the real. The next phase of your due diligence is watching. Here are some things to observe:
“Characterize people by their actions and you’ll never be fooled by their words”
– Unknown
1. Whether or not they asked YOU any of the questions you asked them. If someone doesn’t reciprocate and ask questions about you, it could mean they don’t give a damn. They may not ask you as many questions as you ask them but at the very least, they should be curious enough to know more about who you are and what’s important to you.
2. Whether their actions align with their responses to your questions. If someone claims to be a neat freak but their car is full of empty Starbucks cups, crumpled napkins, dirty laundry or anything else, their actions prove that they are NOT neat. If someone says they are a devout Christian and that they to church weekly but you’ve noticed that they’ve not gone once in the past month, he or she may just be giving lip service. If cleanliness and Christianity are important to you, this might not be the most compatible partner. You determine what to do with that insight.
3. How he/she talks about their ex. Be watchful of people who talk shit about their baby mama’s/daddies and exes. Even if the ex or baby mama did horrible things that caused the relationship to end, your date’s reaction to them will tell you a lot about them. And keep in mind, if things don’t progress, YOU could be the ex in the future. How is he/she going to speak about you to their new date?
4. How they talk about or treat their mom, sister or any close women. If your date answers the phone or if you’re around them, does he seem to have respect for other women (especially his Mom)? Does he treat them kindly? Is he protective?
5. How he/she treats people in the service industry (waiter, doorman, parking attendant, clerk, etc.)
6. If/how much they tip – Is he gracious when being served? Or does he have a sense of entitlement?
7. What he/she posts, likes or follows on social media. You can tell what’s important to someone by what they post, like, and follow. Are they following and liking inspirational quotes, politics, world news, favorite authors, actors or business leaders? Or are they liking and posting half-naked Instagram models and fight videos.
8. If he/she is constantly texting others while with you? This tells you their priorities. On the flip side, if you NEVER hear the phone ring or vibrate when you’re around, it could be that it’s on “do not disturb” to give you full attention or it may be to hide other women/men.
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